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Post by Ɖσмιиιc on Jan 4, 2023 6:10:00 GMT -7
You can do all things through Christ who gives you strength. Without Jesus, we can't do anything. Amen.
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KevinesKay
Administrator
Posts: 1,754 
Occupation: Balloon Artist
Interests: weight lifting, singing, playing the guitar
Days of Integrity: 1 year
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Post by KevinesKay on Jan 8, 2023 20:30:56 GMT -7
Joined SA few weeks ago and it’s been a game changer. I’ve been in different Christian groups however the level of honesty I’m experiencing in SA has been the exception not the norm in the Christian groups. I’ve decided my definition of sobriety is if I get distracted (thoughts, noticing how someone is dressed, pop up’s online, etc.) and catch it(even if I MOMENTARILY dwell) I’m sober, if I pursue anything that is sexually stimulating, I’m not. I’m powerless over lust but I’m not powerless over how I react to it. I'm glad you decided to take that step. Because having that kind of support is a really good thing. I can't say that everything I learned from SA was good. One has to take what you like and leave the rest. But the support was extremely helpful. SA lays down the following as a bottom line: No sex with self or anyone else other than your wife and progressive victory over lust. The problem is that members have defined progressive victory over lust too loosely. I've often heard of members admitting to watching P with no MB, yet still claiming sobriety. I would encourage all to list and continuously update their boundaries to ensure we're not scamming ourselves. But yeah, good job on stepping up your game. |
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Post by rical on Jan 15, 2023 4:40:07 GMT -7
Still doing well however I’m having acting out dreams
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Post by Ɖσмιиιc on Jan 16, 2023 5:38:06 GMT -7
A pastor encouraged me to pray for protection before I sleep. It really helps me. If you don't, please do that and also it helps to listen to the audio bible www.bible.com God bless you, You can do all things through Christ who gives you strength. |
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Post by rical on Apr 27, 2023 8:51:24 GMT -7
Still doing well. I have able to have great but not always pleasant conversations with my wife around recovery for both of us. I going to an event this weekend where the last time I was at the same type of event I totally embarrassed and angered my wife because she caught me looking where I had no business looking. I’m telling myself that the rush I getting from “scoring” is nothing but fake satisfaction. True joy comes from honoring God and my wife by not even thinking about what someone else has to offer.
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KevinesKay
Administrator
Posts: 1,754
Occupation: Balloon Artist
Interests: weight lifting, singing, playing the guitar
Days of Integrity: 1 year
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Post by KevinesKay on Apr 27, 2023 17:17:12 GMT -7
Glad to hear from you ricalIt's interesting to note that our wives along with the Lord have a higher standard of purity and fidelity than we often hold for ourselves. Our wives desire, need, and deserve a husband that demonstrates complete custody and self control of his eyes and mind. What many of us don't understand is that not only does lust hurt our wives and God. But lust also directly hurts ourselves. I'm thoroughly convinced that my flesh is so broken that I could never give myself permission to look at other women at such an event again. There will be those women that come into my circle. I'm not rude and will make eye contact as I'm speaking to them. But for all others outside my circle, they stay in my peripheral vision. And it amazes me how my wife feels a lot more comfortable and trusting around me when she sees that I'm not giving myself permission to look. My flesh cannot be trusted. So for me, it's just been easier to not look then to try practice looking without lusting. |
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Post by Will on Apr 27, 2023 19:28:07 GMT -7
I'm finding that as sobriety increases, I'm struggling somewhat in my interactions with women. I am basically disconnected and as above polite but VERY wary of anything other than that. Some women I meet seem to be quite 'annoyed' by it? There's a woman at work who does the scheduling for my company. She seems to take any opportunity of sending me text messages and there is always an irate tone to them, as though she's annoyed that there's not more 'familiarity' or friendliness between us. Honestly I find it hard to draw the line in a place that works for me (no connection, purely professional) and that does not offend.
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Post by rical on May 7, 2023 15:30:07 GMT -7
Hi, I forgot to follow up. The event was a success with only a couple of distractions. My wife and I were able to connect and completely enjoy ourselves without either one of being on hghi alert.
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