To Tell or Not To Tell

wishing to know the truth about the sexual union you are in, is a 'desire to rule?'

okaaaayyyy

over and out

My story first started by telling my spouse a long secret I held for about 3 years. I confessed to having an affair four different times in the beginning of our marriage. It hurt her and eventually she stood with me. Since it was in the past and God worked in her life to forgive me. I have asked others in a recovery program and some say different things like "don't tell her unless you have a good period of sobriety and have had a talk with your sponsor" them some have told me to tell her eventually since with would be part of making amends, then some told me to not tell her unless it had to do with STD's or something. Them some who were believers told me to tell my wife.

I had battled it a long time. Some times my wife already knew I had looked at porn. I told her a few times during our relationship. She told me that she would leave me if I would not stop looking at porn. Today she does still ask me if I "have done anything bad" . I lie and tell her "no" because I want to keep the peace and confess my sins to God. I know I am sinning but I don't know what else to say. My wife has almost gone crazy and I think even deeply depressed because of my sexual sins. My sins include affairs, porn, masterbation, message parlors, prostitutes, and lusting at women around me and TV. She knows all of this about me but still she has stood with me. I owe this to God and others praying for us. She had stuck with me, a terrible person, for God, for her family and not because of me. I am grateful to others for their honestly to me and I know I should be honest to her. It's hard to tell people to "not tell their wife" but honesty I have never told the entire truth either. I feel if I confess my sins to God them that is enough. And to confess my sins to another. I understand that could my wife, but I confess it to other men around me whom I could trust.