Temptation

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A good metaphor - the roller coaster.  

Steve, thanks for your honesty.

Do you take the paper home with you?

If so, having something like that in my own home (even if I don't look at it) would be a severe violation of my middle circle.

And the very nature of holding something like that in my hand is just as severe of a violation.

We place boundaries in our life not so we can be restricted, but to save us.  They allow us to direct ourselves in a better path.  A path that we truly envision our new recovering selves to take.

It certainly won't kill me if I choose to go without the local paper for the rest of my life.  The same goes for certain movies, or TV shows, or music.  Come to think of it, I watch very little TV or movies anymore since I returned to BG.  I'm too busy doing other things that matter to me more.  And people have considered me a TV addict.

Jesus said that just looking at a woman with lust is adultery.  I think your wife would agree with that one.  And as PAs, we can turn a lot of things into P.  We can even s*xualize The Price is Right or National Enquirer.  But escort ads, like the SI swimsuit issue or er*tic novels and movies, take it to a different level.  Some have called them "borderline".  I call them P.  Don't fall for the "I cannot believe it's not P" substitutes.  A PA has no business entertaining their presence.  It's one of those detestable things.

And if it is that important for my wife and I to look through the local paper every week, I would just have her rip out the back classifieds and throw them away before I get a chance to view it.  My wife would have no problem helping me out in that area.

The fact is I cheated on my ex via a massage parlor.  It destroyed her and our marriage!  I've acted out by MB to images of escorts and I've acted out with escorts and street prostitutes.  And the beast of fornication always wanted more.  I was never satisfied.  That's a dark world that I hope I never have to experience ever again.  And I remember that it started with me imagining what it would be like if I gave in to those ads.  I never again want to entertain any of the images that bring that kind of stuff up.

Steve, you are very wise to bring this up for strong consideration in your life.  You don't want to relapse into P.  And you should definitely give yourself credit for what God has done in you to keep you from P.  I think God really must care about you to make you aware of the potential danger that you're up against.  Just when we think we have this licked, something more comes up, eh?  I hope this helps.  Bless you brother.  We're all behind you in this one.

Your friend and brother in Christ,

KK

Thanks for your honesty Steve. Both you and Kevin have such sensitive spirits and are genuinely sorry to the point that you take action or repent. It's like a 180.

And it's great that your wife agreed to stop getting the paper.

I think your choice is summed up in these 2 verses:


Matthew 5:29-30King James Version (KJV)

29 And if thy right eye offend thee, pluck it out, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell.

30 And if thy right hand offend thee, cut it off, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell.

Obviously the LORD was just using a metaphor here, but he wants us to remove anything in our lives that comes before Him and that can be many things.