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Post by Deleted on Feb 2, 2007 7:50:03 GMT -7
I'm Abby and I'm married to a sex addict. That was so hard to say the first time. We've been married almost 4 years. He admitted his addiction Wednesday night. So this is day 3 of wading through the pain for me.
I'm 25 and pregnant with our second child, a girl due in late April. I'm hoping that this board can help me start to cope. My pastor is great but he doesn't understand. My friend's husband is in GA but she doesn't fully understand me and I don't fully understand her. I'm looking at going to a meeting for spouse's and I'm searching for a marital counselor. I've read every article on the website and printed most of them off. Thank you for all of those, they have helped.
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Post by Deleted on Feb 2, 2007 9:54:11 GMT -7
Abby,
My name is Matt, and I am a sex addict. I remember being devastated when I finally accepted that fact. I have been nearly ruined by pornography. My wife, by God's grace and goodness has been very supportive and understanding about this. Your husband will need to make some difficult decisions in the coming days and months and years. But, if he truly desires freedom from bondage, God will not disappoint.
We will be praying for you.
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Post by Steve on Feb 7, 2007 17:03:11 GMT -7
Abby, welcome to the site! I trust you realize how common your experience is with all the difficulties related to being married to a sex addict.
Do you care to give us an update on how you are doing?
Have you attending a group for spouses/partners? (I strongly suggest finding a group in your area; It's so important to get support from those who understand!)
All the best, Steve
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Post by Deleted on Feb 8, 2007 3:28:12 GMT -7
I am coming to understand that sex addiction is all too common, sadly. I went to my first COSA meeting on Monday and while I personally think the "Higher Power" stuff is cheesy (let's just say it as it is - God), I learned a lot. I've started working on my 12 steps and I'm realizing that things I thought were taken care of, aren't. It was good to be able to tell the truth without fear of embarassment or rejection. I met someone married to a guy with my husband's exact same problem.
I still hurt daily but the pity parties have ceased. I'm trying hard every day to not control my husband. I try not to worry when he's out of my sight and I try not to worry about his seeming lack of help seeking. He tried to go to an SA meeting last night but the meeting had stopped meeting where he was told to go. He's actually told me about a couple of battles he's had in the morning with wanting to M but he hasn't done the deed.
We're on Day 9 and I have a little hope. I'm working on me as hard as I can so that if he does fall, I won't be crushed as badly.
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Post by Steve on Feb 8, 2007 11:49:36 GMT -7
I'm working on me as hard as I can
This little excerpt above has heartened my soul. It sounds like you are doing some very bold and courageous work with no guarantee about how your situation turns out. That takes guts!
Keep up the good work!
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