Post by Deleted on Jan 23, 2007 6:01:07 GMT -7
I think my addiction to sex started when I was around 8. A girl next door and I would play around with her starting it all. Perhaps she was abused. Then I would play around exploring sex with others (me starting) until the discovery phase of sex was done at around 12 where it was no longer accepted to play around with peers. Then my mastrabation phase started where I would act out alone (there was no Internet then - just fantasy and my father's hidden magazines) This went on until about 19 years of age where I discovered prostitutes - I now had money, transportation and independence. Now I am addicted to Internet porn (not a ton but a bit) and prostitutes (about once every 2-3 months).
The reason I am able to slow down my prostitute addiction is I carry no cash with me or bank cards. I only carry credit cards without cash access and I do have access to a checkbook but only used it once. I even went so far to buy a prostitute shoes in return for sex so I could use my credit card. When I say sex I mean I never have had actual sex with a prostitute since I was married 2 years ago - other lesser stuff gets me off. I told my wife about my addiction and started seeing a sex addiction counselor before we were married 2 years ago. Abstenent for about 8 months - also tried 12 step but not sure if I liked it. I no longer see the counselor but have the lines of communication open - saw him 9 months ago. I tell my wife everytime I have a re-lapse. Her rule is no street prostitutes - I broke that promise once. The rest are massage parlors which she does not mind as much. It hurts her to know but she likes the honesty. I came very close to remaining single on purpose because I did not want to hurt my wife to be... but we were both in love.
We have a one year old and will soon have another birth this summer. My wife and I were married in our mid 30s - both first marriage - we wanted kids - have enough now and will stop just before it's too late biologically. My life is really good career wise but I am a bit depressed - I think I will break out of depression soon as I make a major career change. I know I need to replace my empty feelings and depression with something good. Thanks for listening - I like these forums a lot - just discovered them. I know there are a ton of other things about my sex addiction I have not yet spoken about but there is only so much time - I should be working - this is an excellent replacement for surfing the net for sex...which is a waste of time.
The reason I am able to slow down my prostitute addiction is I carry no cash with me or bank cards. I only carry credit cards without cash access and I do have access to a checkbook but only used it once. I even went so far to buy a prostitute shoes in return for sex so I could use my credit card. When I say sex I mean I never have had actual sex with a prostitute since I was married 2 years ago - other lesser stuff gets me off. I told my wife about my addiction and started seeing a sex addiction counselor before we were married 2 years ago. Abstenent for about 8 months - also tried 12 step but not sure if I liked it. I no longer see the counselor but have the lines of communication open - saw him 9 months ago. I tell my wife everytime I have a re-lapse. Her rule is no street prostitutes - I broke that promise once. The rest are massage parlors which she does not mind as much. It hurts her to know but she likes the honesty. I came very close to remaining single on purpose because I did not want to hurt my wife to be... but we were both in love.
We have a one year old and will soon have another birth this summer. My wife and I were married in our mid 30s - both first marriage - we wanted kids - have enough now and will stop just before it's too late biologically. My life is really good career wise but I am a bit depressed - I think I will break out of depression soon as I make a major career change. I know I need to replace my empty feelings and depression with something good. Thanks for listening - I like these forums a lot - just discovered them. I know there are a ton of other things about my sex addiction I have not yet spoken about but there is only so much time - I should be working - this is an excellent replacement for surfing the net for sex...which is a waste of time.