Post by Deleted on Jan 4, 2007 10:51:35 GMT -7
Hello everyone,
I'm new to the site and I'm making my way through the resources and posts, trying to understand my current situation. I've been in a dating relationship with a man for 7 months now. He admitted early on in our friendship that he looked at porn, but told me it wasn't an issue and he could stop if we became a couple. Well, that was a lie. I've since found out that he is extremely addicted to porn and has lied to me over and over again to get his fix. I have found out that he is a member of over a hundred forums about his particular fetish addiction. His affection toward me changes dramatically day to day. He keeps promising to go to counseling, but hasn't followed through. Every time I bust him, he tells me he's sorry and he wants to change. I've read through some of the posts here and have little hope that the man I've fallen in love with will change. I know for a fact I won't marry him the way things are, but I'm just trying to figure how much longer I'll even give this relationship. I pray and I wonder if God brought me into his life to show him God's love and truth....then again I wonder if I was just seeing what I wanted to see from the beginning. It's so hard for me to understand this addiction. He keeps wanting to move forward in the relationship, he's even talking marriage, yet he keeps sabatoging everything with his lies and my heart breaks constantly. At the same time he gets so hurt when I honestly tell him that I cannot commit my heart in matrimony knowing this issue in his life will destroy our marriage.
So at the beginning of the new year we're back to the drawing board again. He's promised to go to counseling, attend church regularly, do bible study...he even gave me his computer to show me how serious he is...so we shall see what happens.
In the meantime I will continue to pray, learn more about this addiction, read the experiences of others and try to find my way...whether I stay with him or not I want to make sure that he sees the importance of God in his life so I want to make sure I handle this in a way that gives God glory...but at the same time I don't forget my worth in the process.
God bless.
I'm new to the site and I'm making my way through the resources and posts, trying to understand my current situation. I've been in a dating relationship with a man for 7 months now. He admitted early on in our friendship that he looked at porn, but told me it wasn't an issue and he could stop if we became a couple. Well, that was a lie. I've since found out that he is extremely addicted to porn and has lied to me over and over again to get his fix. I have found out that he is a member of over a hundred forums about his particular fetish addiction. His affection toward me changes dramatically day to day. He keeps promising to go to counseling, but hasn't followed through. Every time I bust him, he tells me he's sorry and he wants to change. I've read through some of the posts here and have little hope that the man I've fallen in love with will change. I know for a fact I won't marry him the way things are, but I'm just trying to figure how much longer I'll even give this relationship. I pray and I wonder if God brought me into his life to show him God's love and truth....then again I wonder if I was just seeing what I wanted to see from the beginning. It's so hard for me to understand this addiction. He keeps wanting to move forward in the relationship, he's even talking marriage, yet he keeps sabatoging everything with his lies and my heart breaks constantly. At the same time he gets so hurt when I honestly tell him that I cannot commit my heart in matrimony knowing this issue in his life will destroy our marriage.
So at the beginning of the new year we're back to the drawing board again. He's promised to go to counseling, attend church regularly, do bible study...he even gave me his computer to show me how serious he is...so we shall see what happens.
In the meantime I will continue to pray, learn more about this addiction, read the experiences of others and try to find my way...whether I stay with him or not I want to make sure that he sees the importance of God in his life so I want to make sure I handle this in a way that gives God glory...but at the same time I don't forget my worth in the process.
God bless.