The Sexual Male

What really struck me about the book was its blunt honesty about male sexuality. He describes male sexuality as I would, if I were asked, based on my experience of myself and from observing other males over 44 years. I had never been asked until recently when I started trying to help others on line deal with male purity issues. As I started looking into resources, I found this book, and it confirmed my experiences and observations.

I find it particularly invaluable in helping women understand how males work sexually. The true nature of male sexuality has largely been hidden from females. Once they read a book like this or Every Man's Battle, their eyes are open to the temptations males face and they get to see what a male needs to do if he really seeks purity. I find this so important, because in most cases it is the woman who has to push the man into getting his purity act together.

By the time I read the book, I had already read several other books on purity and had been convicted of my behaviour [after being called on it repeatedly by my wife] so it has only helped me in this sense that I know my temptations to sin sexually [primarily by looking lustfully and masturbation, and perverted fantasies] are universal temptations for males from puberty on. Its main help has been to the wives and mothers I have refered the book to in their efforts to understand and help the males in their lives.

As far as themes that struck me, I will just list a few quotes where he bravely says it like it is:

From the moment sex hormones start to flow, the male begins a battle. It is a battle for control, and the male who does not engage in this battle is dangerous to women and society.

We have turned good, otherwise healthy males into compulsive masturbators and obsessional addicts.

We love the sexual feelings but hate the things the feelings want us to do.

[the sex drive] ...can reduce the most sophisticated male to the level of the brute beast of the jungle.

Every male transitioning from childhood through adolescence to adulthood has to develope a system of self-control over his sexuality. It is alarming how few parents understand this.

Wherever Christianity went, women were liberated and their status elevated so that they began to be viewed as socially equal to men. Meanwhile, alongside this liberation the sexuality of the male also had to be contained and confined. This made stable and long-term relationships possible.

 

Well, there will be a lot of overlap, but I think that is a good thing, becuase I think women and girls need to hear from a couple of sources or they will tend to discount what they read--"guys can't really be like that".

For a book purely on modesty, I think the best is a very short one called "Secret Keeper" by Dannah Gresh. I feel your wife should read "THe Sexual Male" and either "Every Man's Battle" or "Every Young Man's Battle". EYMB would be appropriate for your boys. Before she dates or goes off to college, your daughter should read the same books as your wife--the timing is up to you.

Good luck