KevinesKay
Administrator
Posts: 1,742
Occupation: Balloon Artist
Interests: weight lifting, singing, playing the guitar
Days of Integrity: 1 year
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Post by KevinesKay on May 2, 2021 18:43:59 GMT -7
š
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on May 3, 2021 4:21:48 GMT -7
Thanks for your prayers and understanding brother. It's a comfort to know that I'm not the only husband like this. We can do all things through Christ who gives us strength.
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javajake
Silver Member
Posts: 382
Occupation: retired
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Post by javajake on May 3, 2021 10:30:13 GMT -7
I willing fell off the horse last night. Full package. Tried justifying the whole thing. But the Lord and my conscience said no.
And it wasnāt the media boxš
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on May 3, 2021 17:58:22 GMT -7
Dear God, please restore this brother and help him. Please purity his mind again and his heart and cast out any demons of lust that might be tempting him. Please Lord, in Jesus' name. Amen.
John 15
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Post by savedbygrace on May 10, 2021 9:52:51 GMT -7
AMEN
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Post by Will on May 14, 2021 5:24:41 GMT -7
Bro get back on!!! Ask Jesus to show you how much He loves you!
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javajake
Silver Member
Posts: 382
Occupation: retired
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Post by javajake on Jun 24, 2021 8:19:38 GMT -7
June has not been good. Neither have I. Struggling.
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javajake
Silver Member
Posts: 382
Occupation: retired
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Post by javajake on Jun 24, 2021 9:49:01 GMT -7
Jim on April 8th, 2019 - 5:42am I am a Christian who has struggled on and off with porn since I was a teen. Oh sure you can smash your computer and flush your smartphone down the toilet, but it wonāt help. And while I agree accountability and community are important in beating any addiction the truth is itās not enough. The times I have gone the long stretches with no perversion is when I was in a deep intimate relationship with God. As people we desire intimate relationship and we are meant to have a deep meaningful relationship with our creator. David says in Psalm 42 and I paraphrase, āthe deep things in me cry out to the deep things in you God!ā I would spend ample time in prayer and in the word every morning making a heart felt honest connection with God and being honest with him. I would pour out my heart. Telling him deep things about me that no one knows (of course he already knows) I would sit quiet and let Him respond to my heart. He would give me this intense love for people and I would pray for whoever He would bring to my mind. I would read the Bible and the words would jump off the page and run over my soul like warm oil. (Sorry only way to describe the sensation) We were in this amazing relationship that brought fulfillment and joy. Even though I would still struggle with porn, I would still seek God every morning knowing that even my righteousness as the Bible says, is as filthy rags compared to his holiness. Iām only made holy because of Jesus and not by my own self-righteous acts. When I would mess up I just felt God say āitās covered. I just want to spend time with you.ā I began to realize something very important, itās God coming close to me that makes me holy and not me trying to do God a big favor by destroying my computer every time I messed up. Perversion began to leave as I began to get a high spending time with God. Itās like it took the place of the porn over time. I liked being able to talk to young women without feeling like a perve or having the guilt draped on me like a heavy wet blanket. I could walk down the street in the summer and was able to hold my head high despite all the naked flesh around me. It was unbeleivable freedom. I went a good two years like that but got distracted by work, ministry ambitions, and people pleasing. In other words I began to get self-righteous. I stopped having a deep daily connection with God and the desire for porn came right back. I have slipped but Iām getting right back up. After all it is called the āfight of faithā for a reason. So please. Get back up and donāt quit. Jesus paid the price so we can come to God anytime. Itās our own religious pride that keeps us from God. There is no waiting period. Jesus took care of it 2000 years ago. So get back up without delay and keep fighting. Donāt believe the lie that your sin keeps you from God after all we sin sometimes without even realizing it. Develop relationship. Heās your Savior, King, Father, and Best Friend. He wants to be in your world in every way and isnāt afraid of your sexuality. After all he created it.
problematic on March 21st, 2020 - 9:19pm Iām no longer guiltless about it, or ignorant about it being sinful for a reason (you turn another person into an object to be traded,used,discarded at minimum) and it devolves into worse things in the world and alone in it. Doesnāt do the trick though to make me stop. I can at best muster 3-4 days before nature, or my nature,whichever has me back at it. I mean Iāve tried every mental justification possible to loophole it to not feel bad about it as I once didnāt, like maybe if itās a fictional character/ 3d model/cartoon. The chastisement is there and not going anywhere, and thatās for the best. Something Iām in, not proud of, but itās got a very strong button to press. I hope Iām not fighting this at age 70 or anything. Does it NEVER tire? That fire of lust never burn out? Seems to only do it when you give into it, let it have you for a bit, and then like embers it restarts. The crazy thing is, in real life, I control myself perfectly fine. Iāve turned down offers for little bits of fun from very appealing women, just enraging/hurting their feelings. Iām able to say sure, youāre pretty, but not worth the headache/consequence/guilt of it. I donāt want to be sleeping and waking up next to a stranger, I donāt like that feeling,worrying if you are as healthy that way as you are pretty. No thanks. Not worth it. Come fantasy, porn,etc.. no such strength exists in me
Two posts I got from another site awhile back. First one sounds like what Saved is experiencing. I want that.
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javajake
Silver Member
Posts: 382
Occupation: retired
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Post by javajake on Jul 5, 2021 20:00:44 GMT -7
2 Corinthians 5:17 KJV
17 Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Jul 5, 2021 20:10:31 GMT -7
Amen, I want to be found in Jesus.
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javajake
Silver Member
Posts: 382
Occupation: retired
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Post by javajake on Jul 10, 2021 11:51:54 GMT -7
Last week or so has not been good. 2 or 3 times I wallowed in the mudd. I feel the Lord gently pulling me to spend quality time with Him but have been half hearted and sometimes even ignoring it to my shame. Lord I ask your forgiveness for my lukewarm behavior which I know you hate. Please help me not to ignore your call to be close to you and to be number 1 in my life. In Jesus great name I pray. Amen.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
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Post by Deleted on Jul 10, 2021 20:07:03 GMT -7
Amen, pray for me too. Dear God, please help javajake to be pure and holy as You are Lord. Please renew our minds according to you lovingkindness and your mercies. In Jesus' name. Amen.
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Post by savagetribe on Jul 17, 2021 21:50:07 GMT -7
If you haven't watched the show the Chosen, Mary went before Jesus ashamed after she backslid and she couldn't look him in the eye. He said, "Mary, look at me. I love you." She said, "How can you because I have wronged you and betrayed you? Please forgive me Lord." Jesus said, "you are forgiven and I love you with all of my heart." That scene was so powerful to me. We get caught up in our own shame, guilt and betrayal and forget that Jesus is saying..."stop!, look at me. I love you." When we repent and ask for forgiveness, he showers us with his love but we must accept his gift. Peter asked Jesus how many times we are to forgive our brother and sister. Seven times Lord? Jesus says, I tell you not 7 times but 70 x 7. The point of the story is as many times as needed for all eternity. That's how many times Jesus forgives us who have a repentant heart. I didn't really want to post a sermon but grace can get lost in the translation of our guilt, our shame and our betrayal. Jesus sacrificed his life for us and we are covered by his blood. There is always a way out even though sometimes there are consequences which I've experienced recently. His grace is sufficient and pray you cling on to this belief and take his grace from the head to the heart. Pray it wells up like living water in your spirit and gives you peace.
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javajake
Silver Member
Posts: 382
Occupation: retired
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Post by javajake on Jul 29, 2021 11:10:45 GMT -7
Had couple more falls maybe a week or so ago. Iām trying to fill a hole only God can. I thank the Lord Iām not how I was when I was lost. I thank the Lord His spirit convicts me and pulls me back to Him. Iām lazy, inconsistent and stupid. But God loves me. A friend of mine told me about Chosen. Need to watch it. He said it was great also.
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Post by Will on Jul 30, 2021 18:48:52 GMT -7
Hey bro. You're not lazy, inconsistent and stupid! Please don't confess that over yourself. You're a servant of the Most High God. If you insult the servant, you insult the master. You are a beloved child of God, who has given you the righteousness of His son Jesus. That righteousness will eventually play out in your holiness, praise God! This is something someone showed me, they highlighted to me how much I was doing that and said 'stop it'. You are a temple of the Holy Spirit and a Saint (yes a Saint! Paul called the Corinthian Church 'Saints' even when they were sinning so much!) The Holy Spirit in you communing with your spirit makes you a Saint. That carries a certain amount of honor, honor that belongs to God. So you are going to get back up and go forward from Glory to Glory in Christ's Kingdom. God bless you bro!
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