Deleted
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Post by Deleted on May 21, 2017 6:56:55 GMT -7
Some times I feel like castrating myself. I listened to a sermon that said you should kill your sexuality. I think the easiest way to got victory over MB would be to cut off my offending member. I know God's will is not often the easiest thing. I believe self-mutilation is caused by self hatred. How do I overcome my negative thoughts?
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KevinesKay
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Occupation: Balloon Artist
Interests: weight lifting, singing, playing the guitar
Days of Integrity: 1 year
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Post by KevinesKay on May 22, 2017 8:38:09 GMT -7
Well I'm sure glad you didn't castrate yourself. Don't do it!
You mentioned self hatred, and I think your on to something. Because as a PA,self hatred was a huge driving force behind my acting out. The devil fed me all sorts of lies saying that:
I'm a horrible, worthless piece of junk.
No one will really love me, especially if they really knew me and knew what I was doing.
I need sex, and if I don't get it, I'll need to get it from porn or prostitutes.
Porn is sex which is equal to love.
Crazy lies, and I ate them up. And until I dealt with these false core beliefs, I was doomed to acting out again.
Back to the issue of self hatred. In my life, God felt that was way much more a problem then my use of porn or MB. So I had to grudgingly accept that God had a different order of importance when it came to molding me towards perfection. I came here just wanting to stop the P and MB. Meanwhile, God's priorities were a bit different.
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Post by Deleted on May 24, 2017 3:30:36 GMT -7
I don't know if this is a lie or not, but it seems to me that s*x is a big negative. I guess with out it none of us would exist. It sure has messed a lot of people up.
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KevinesKay
Administrator
Posts: 1,754
Occupation: Balloon Artist
Interests: weight lifting, singing, playing the guitar
Days of Integrity: 1 year
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Post by KevinesKay on May 24, 2017 4:32:10 GMT -7
That's a lie too, treborkcub. I blamed the presence of sex my addiction for many years. The truth is, sex is beautiful and amazing. The problem is that man, with his ugly, abominable thoughts and imaginations, perverts God's gift and turns it into something unhealthy and destructive.
It's so bad now that people, even Christians, have a problem disciphering between healthy sexuality and unhealthy. And in church, you rarely hear a sermon discussing sex other than DON'T do this or DON'T do that.
Over time, if you keep pursuing God, His purity, and His will in your life, He will instill His wisdom in you so that you can have a more balanced view on sex. There is hope! Don't give up. It does get better.
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