Post by Deleted on Dec 16, 2016 14:20:10 GMT -7
I called a number for a support group for wives of porn addicts at my church and a lady is coming to my home to meet with me on Tuesday. I know I desperately need this ministry. But I'm terrified to tell my husband. I'm so afraid he's going to completely freak out. We live in a small town and he's a mental health professional, so I think he's going to fear losing his career if word gets out. I'm so afraid he's going to yell and throw things and accuse me of ruining us.
A few days ago he promised to put porn blockers on his phone and computer and set up his Web history to go to an accountability partner. This was huge for me and for a couple days I felt better. But I keep being reminded of some things he said to me about how he doesn't think porn is a big deal and doesn't understand why I'm bothering him about it. He has no idea how much pain I've been in for years, and I don't know how to tell him. Anytime I approach the subject he flips out. I feel like I owe it to him to tell him that despite what he's said, yes, our marriage is actually in trouble. I'm afraid he'll freak out and put the blame on me being too sensitive.
I just can't stop thinking about him committing adultery in his heart with hundreds of women. I'm so filled with regret. I'd never have gotten married if I'd known my life would be like this. I don't want to leave him. But I also don't think I can keep living this way. I'm so willing to forgive and to fight this with him, but what can I do if he doesn't think there's a problem?
A few days ago he promised to put porn blockers on his phone and computer and set up his Web history to go to an accountability partner. This was huge for me and for a couple days I felt better. But I keep being reminded of some things he said to me about how he doesn't think porn is a big deal and doesn't understand why I'm bothering him about it. He has no idea how much pain I've been in for years, and I don't know how to tell him. Anytime I approach the subject he flips out. I feel like I owe it to him to tell him that despite what he's said, yes, our marriage is actually in trouble. I'm afraid he'll freak out and put the blame on me being too sensitive.
I just can't stop thinking about him committing adultery in his heart with hundreds of women. I'm so filled with regret. I'd never have gotten married if I'd known my life would be like this. I don't want to leave him. But I also don't think I can keep living this way. I'm so willing to forgive and to fight this with him, but what can I do if he doesn't think there's a problem?