Post by Deleted on Feb 17, 2006 20:01:05 GMT -7
Hey Everyone,
I really appreciate the humility, openness and honesty that is evidenced on this site. I have read many of the posts here and I can identify with much that has been shared. My story is different than most of the ones I read, because my victory came about in a unique way.
When I was 12, my best friend introduced me to computer porn at his house. His parents used to watch porn and exposed him to it. I didn't actually look it up on my own after that, but a demon of lust attached itself to my soul through that experience. And that is not a metaphor. I mean "pneumati to akatharto," an unclean spirit, an evil entity. The adjective "akatharto" often carries with it the flavor of sexual perversion in the Greek, so many of the demons Jesus cast out were related to sexual perversion. It did not touch my spirit, because I was born again, but it bound me in my soul (mind, will, emotions). You know that feeling you get when you're looking at porn and your face gets flushed, your heart starts pounding, your ears turn red, and you become unaware of what's going on around because you're so engrossed? That is a demon twisting your proper sexual desire. The more you get into it, the more the demon seizes control of your desires and the more he can twist and manipulate you to do his bidding. Satan is not omnipresent, so he sends demons to do his bidding. Many of you are trying to crucify your flesh, which is good and indispensable, but you must realize that there are real, actual demons in your soul that need to be evicted before you can be free. I resisted them directly and threw them out.
Around the same time, a little before, my dad, with good intentions, gave me a book called "Preparing for Adolesence" by James Dobson which introduced me to masturbation. That's right. I didn't know about it until I read that book, in which he argued that it was ok. It's not and he's wrong. That's not to say he's a bad person and his ministry is defunct, but he is wrong on this point, and his (and other's) compromise with the devil on this point is wrong and I'm sure it has misled more people than myself.
There were three key things that set me free:
The first was similar to what my high school football coach always told me. You've got to want to win worse than you want to breathe. You got to realize the seriousness of the sin. It's not just "something everyone struggles with." It leads straight to the gates of hell (Prov. 7), and that is where the devil wants to take us. He is in 100% earnest. But praise God, we are not everyone, we are Christians and we are made to win, every time. This also means that we must be so desparate that we don't care about our repuation or our life. All we care about is the presence of God and the power of the Holy Spirit in our lives because we're so hungry and thirsty.
The second key was understanding that my identity was other than the sin. As a born-again believer, our confession is not, "Woe is me, for I am a terd, and must struggle through this weary life until my end comes and I slip into heaven through the back door." Rather I understood that I was reborn, far above any demon power. I was made to tread on them, and they could be no means touch me. I stopped seeing as me vs. my flesh, but God and I vs. the devil. My flesh was crucified with Christ (Rom 6) and I no longer have to serve it. The power of the blood of Christ is far and away more powerful than anything Satan can throw at you!
The third was "dwelling in the secret place of the Most High." This is tied to Hebrews 4:16, about coming boldly before the throne of grace for help in time of need. Who is to come to the throne of grace? Perfect people? NO! Ones who need grace (enabling ability). That provision is for you and me. No matter how much guilt or condemnation I felt, I would keep coming before God, receiving His mercy, and asking for His enabling power to overcome, which He freely gave because it has already been paid for. Everything you need has already been paid for. (2 Peter 1:3) This is the secret place.
I'm all for accountability, but I don't trust it, and it is not the main answer. The power of the resurrection of Christ is the answer. To the degree accountability can minister that reality, is the degree that it will be effective. It is possible for it simply to become another idol that replaces porn if it is only pride in human ability. I am totally free today soley because of Jesus Christ revealed to me. I had no accountability relationships at the time. I am currently in a church and in a discipleship relationship as all Christians should be, but it was "the Son that set me free." (John 8)
That said, however, Jesus Christ has instituted an authority structure in His church. If we are not under the authority of a church that believes in the power of God, we are free game for the devil. I would be if I was not under the authority of such a church now. Even though I initially got free directly from God because there was no one I could get help from, I have stayed free through submitting to spiritual authority. God administrates His power and authority on the earth through the church and His ministers, and you must submit to it if you want to walk in victory. There is a supernatural grace that comes to you through obedience. That is part of the desparation part.
For the women out there, if your husband who struggles with porn wants to keep it a secret, and will not bow and get help from God's ministers on the earth, he is not bowing to God and is in rebellion. He is trying to "save his life" (reputation), and will forfeit his soul if he continues. I guarantee you that if he will submit himself to someone with spiritual authority derived from freedom in this area, he will be set free. If not, he's just playing around. So if you love him, shoot straight with him. His soul is on the line.
To conclude, the devil is not as big as he looks. It IS winnable and you don't have to put up with it in your life. I found freedom and its available to all.
I really appreciate the humility, openness and honesty that is evidenced on this site. I have read many of the posts here and I can identify with much that has been shared. My story is different than most of the ones I read, because my victory came about in a unique way.
When I was 12, my best friend introduced me to computer porn at his house. His parents used to watch porn and exposed him to it. I didn't actually look it up on my own after that, but a demon of lust attached itself to my soul through that experience. And that is not a metaphor. I mean "pneumati to akatharto," an unclean spirit, an evil entity. The adjective "akatharto" often carries with it the flavor of sexual perversion in the Greek, so many of the demons Jesus cast out were related to sexual perversion. It did not touch my spirit, because I was born again, but it bound me in my soul (mind, will, emotions). You know that feeling you get when you're looking at porn and your face gets flushed, your heart starts pounding, your ears turn red, and you become unaware of what's going on around because you're so engrossed? That is a demon twisting your proper sexual desire. The more you get into it, the more the demon seizes control of your desires and the more he can twist and manipulate you to do his bidding. Satan is not omnipresent, so he sends demons to do his bidding. Many of you are trying to crucify your flesh, which is good and indispensable, but you must realize that there are real, actual demons in your soul that need to be evicted before you can be free. I resisted them directly and threw them out.
Around the same time, a little before, my dad, with good intentions, gave me a book called "Preparing for Adolesence" by James Dobson which introduced me to masturbation. That's right. I didn't know about it until I read that book, in which he argued that it was ok. It's not and he's wrong. That's not to say he's a bad person and his ministry is defunct, but he is wrong on this point, and his (and other's) compromise with the devil on this point is wrong and I'm sure it has misled more people than myself.
There were three key things that set me free:
The first was similar to what my high school football coach always told me. You've got to want to win worse than you want to breathe. You got to realize the seriousness of the sin. It's not just "something everyone struggles with." It leads straight to the gates of hell (Prov. 7), and that is where the devil wants to take us. He is in 100% earnest. But praise God, we are not everyone, we are Christians and we are made to win, every time. This also means that we must be so desparate that we don't care about our repuation or our life. All we care about is the presence of God and the power of the Holy Spirit in our lives because we're so hungry and thirsty.
The second key was understanding that my identity was other than the sin. As a born-again believer, our confession is not, "Woe is me, for I am a terd, and must struggle through this weary life until my end comes and I slip into heaven through the back door." Rather I understood that I was reborn, far above any demon power. I was made to tread on them, and they could be no means touch me. I stopped seeing as me vs. my flesh, but God and I vs. the devil. My flesh was crucified with Christ (Rom 6) and I no longer have to serve it. The power of the blood of Christ is far and away more powerful than anything Satan can throw at you!
The third was "dwelling in the secret place of the Most High." This is tied to Hebrews 4:16, about coming boldly before the throne of grace for help in time of need. Who is to come to the throne of grace? Perfect people? NO! Ones who need grace (enabling ability). That provision is for you and me. No matter how much guilt or condemnation I felt, I would keep coming before God, receiving His mercy, and asking for His enabling power to overcome, which He freely gave because it has already been paid for. Everything you need has already been paid for. (2 Peter 1:3) This is the secret place.
I'm all for accountability, but I don't trust it, and it is not the main answer. The power of the resurrection of Christ is the answer. To the degree accountability can minister that reality, is the degree that it will be effective. It is possible for it simply to become another idol that replaces porn if it is only pride in human ability. I am totally free today soley because of Jesus Christ revealed to me. I had no accountability relationships at the time. I am currently in a church and in a discipleship relationship as all Christians should be, but it was "the Son that set me free." (John 8)
That said, however, Jesus Christ has instituted an authority structure in His church. If we are not under the authority of a church that believes in the power of God, we are free game for the devil. I would be if I was not under the authority of such a church now. Even though I initially got free directly from God because there was no one I could get help from, I have stayed free through submitting to spiritual authority. God administrates His power and authority on the earth through the church and His ministers, and you must submit to it if you want to walk in victory. There is a supernatural grace that comes to you through obedience. That is part of the desparation part.
For the women out there, if your husband who struggles with porn wants to keep it a secret, and will not bow and get help from God's ministers on the earth, he is not bowing to God and is in rebellion. He is trying to "save his life" (reputation), and will forfeit his soul if he continues. I guarantee you that if he will submit himself to someone with spiritual authority derived from freedom in this area, he will be set free. If not, he's just playing around. So if you love him, shoot straight with him. His soul is on the line.
To conclude, the devil is not as big as he looks. It IS winnable and you don't have to put up with it in your life. I found freedom and its available to all.
