Post by Deleted on Oct 10, 2013 6:46:13 GMT -7
Dear Struggling
Trust can only be built up by means of positive responses on the part of the offending partner. That means demonstrable actions that signal a genuine repentance. Words of promise by themselves need to to be accompanied by action (i.e. lifestyle changes) if the aggrieved partner is ever going to be able to forgive and trust again.
Your husband needs to be willing to alter his lifestyle : first and foremost to keep himself away from the source triggers of his porn addiction (e.g. adult sex shops, privately surfing the Internet etc.). If he's not willing to do this, it's highly likely that he will soon fall again into porn. His deliverance is only possible if he resists the devil and that means proactive decisions to change rather than reactive ones. Be sure of one thing : Satan will put it into his mind to go back to porn. Without any clear changes in his life he remains a sitting duck for the devil. Once he succumbs to renewed demonic temptation, then his addiction will be off and running again, (worse than before -- see Luke 11:24-26) accompanied by the aggressiveness that you have described.
I would suggest that he and you meet again with your pastor and that your husband covenant in your presence a change of lifestyle that includes activities promoting spiritual and physical well-being (daily Bible reading, daily prayers of confession with cries for Divine strength etc., a strenuous exercise programme). If he is not willing to effect any meaningful change, he may wind up bound up in his sin habit for the rest of his life. Take it from me... I've been there. One simply cannot conquer a sin habit by merely thinking positively and not doing anything about it.
Trust can only be built up by means of positive responses on the part of the offending partner. That means demonstrable actions that signal a genuine repentance. Words of promise by themselves need to to be accompanied by action (i.e. lifestyle changes) if the aggrieved partner is ever going to be able to forgive and trust again.
Your husband needs to be willing to alter his lifestyle : first and foremost to keep himself away from the source triggers of his porn addiction (e.g. adult sex shops, privately surfing the Internet etc.). If he's not willing to do this, it's highly likely that he will soon fall again into porn. His deliverance is only possible if he resists the devil and that means proactive decisions to change rather than reactive ones. Be sure of one thing : Satan will put it into his mind to go back to porn. Without any clear changes in his life he remains a sitting duck for the devil. Once he succumbs to renewed demonic temptation, then his addiction will be off and running again, (worse than before -- see Luke 11:24-26) accompanied by the aggressiveness that you have described.
I would suggest that he and you meet again with your pastor and that your husband covenant in your presence a change of lifestyle that includes activities promoting spiritual and physical well-being (daily Bible reading, daily prayers of confession with cries for Divine strength etc., a strenuous exercise programme). If he is not willing to effect any meaningful change, he may wind up bound up in his sin habit for the rest of his life. Take it from me... I've been there. One simply cannot conquer a sin habit by merely thinking positively and not doing anything about it.