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Post by Deleted on Oct 23, 2011 6:29:06 GMT -7
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Post by Deleted on Oct 23, 2011 8:48:26 GMT -7
I dont think things will be the same but they could be even better if he stays in rexovery and showers you with the love loyalty and affection you deserve. My husband now agrees he has a problem but has stated he isnt getting into recovery for me because he hates me.
So i am.envious of the husbands who admit they are wrong and.have a.problem and then.change there ways 180 degrees.
I guess you have to try and forgive him, if he is truly xhanged his ways.
Remember its an addiction to numb whatever pain he is suffering from.
And remember to focus on you and your health. Is there an s-anon support group in your area?
Alanon would work too just know its not alcohol he is addicted to its sex and lusting.
I hope i have helped in some way i feel i am rambling!
Take care of you!
N2bfree
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Post by Deleted on Oct 23, 2011 9:11:35 GMT -7
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Post by Deleted on Oct 23, 2011 16:27:36 GMT -7
hi. that incident doesnt surprise me, you will torture yourself with those images until you say enough. dont allow the husbands old behaviours to have entrance into your life anymore...all its doing is robbing you of peace of mind and a future. i wish i couldve told myself that 4 years ago (post - confession). i have had to choose what i spend/waste my time thinking about. its been 4 years for us and although a very difficult and painful road, together and starting to build a life from out of the ashes. it does get better. perhaps it would be helpful to pray something along these lines - Lord, I dont want these thoughts anymore, they hurt my heart and strive to break up my marriage yet again. I give my worries to you and if theres anything I need to know or be concerned about, I pray you will show me, according to your word, 'theres nothing hidden that shall not be revealed'. In Jesus name, Amen.
I have to remind myself that while Im worrying, he cannot work on my situation. (All this providing your husband isnt still acting out!)
Hugs to you xx
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Post by Deleted on Oct 23, 2011 23:06:23 GMT -7
I am a man, but I have grown up in a home where I was erased or I feel it that way, so I might need to have the same attitude as many others; Boundaries, know who I am, love myself, respect myself; Know who I am so that I can know how I can respect myself and threat myself good and so on.. might be important for me
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Post by Deleted on Oct 24, 2011 9:29:07 GMT -7
Dear LadyP,
Please don't feel stupid. He violated your trust and you have every right to be suspicious. Whenever my husband gets a message or does something that could be misinterpreted....I jump to conclusions to this day.
There is nothing wrong with you. He violated your trust. He should be doing everything possible to rebuild that trust. He has to accept that your reactions are perfectly normal reactions to stress and the extreme violation of trust. Please don't be hard on yourself.
My best, DW
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