Post by Deleted on Jun 13, 2011 7:35:48 GMT -7
Hi to everyone,
It has taken me a long time and some humbling used by the Lord to bring me to a place of desperation over my sin.
Like just about every other pre- or adolescent boy, I was exposed to porn early on and have experienced varying degrees of freedom from it throughout my life (I'm now 28). I'm realizing today is the day to branch out and stop isolating myself in this struggle.
It seems like my self-image can't be repaired and I won't find true freedom until I'm willing to do things God's way. I think one of my problems in the past has been to not take sin and its consequences seriously.
Pride and disbelieving that the connection I need with others for my healing have played a role in why I haven't chosen right or taken responsibility. I know we need other people in our lives and God doesn't want us to live in shame. I've gotten so tired of the powerlessness and inability to express (emotional stunting) that's come out of all these compromises I've made along the way. Hiding is not for Sons of the Living God!
I can see how there was a point a few years ago when I could've chosen to be more diligent, but the emotions and guilty feelings from past mistakes and hurts caused me to disconnect even more and plunge further into porn. This seems to be a problem with the whole porn/masturbation addiction thing. It serves as an escape from having to deal with life and the legitimate emotions that I have felt in the past and their implications. Wounds from others and family that I never had an ability to process through or heal from have been a driving force for this escape.
I'm glad forums like this exist and I'm praying the Lord can use this in my life and others' to gain some much needed perspective on this struggle. Maybe someone will be encouraged by my perspective here too and we can walk together towards the Lord. I'm looking forward to getting down to the bottom of this and hopefully ultimately finding some real freedom.
We all need each other for sure!
~ A brother in the Lord
It has taken me a long time and some humbling used by the Lord to bring me to a place of desperation over my sin.
Like just about every other pre- or adolescent boy, I was exposed to porn early on and have experienced varying degrees of freedom from it throughout my life (I'm now 28). I'm realizing today is the day to branch out and stop isolating myself in this struggle.
It seems like my self-image can't be repaired and I won't find true freedom until I'm willing to do things God's way. I think one of my problems in the past has been to not take sin and its consequences seriously.
Pride and disbelieving that the connection I need with others for my healing have played a role in why I haven't chosen right or taken responsibility. I know we need other people in our lives and God doesn't want us to live in shame. I've gotten so tired of the powerlessness and inability to express (emotional stunting) that's come out of all these compromises I've made along the way. Hiding is not for Sons of the Living God!
I can see how there was a point a few years ago when I could've chosen to be more diligent, but the emotions and guilty feelings from past mistakes and hurts caused me to disconnect even more and plunge further into porn. This seems to be a problem with the whole porn/masturbation addiction thing. It serves as an escape from having to deal with life and the legitimate emotions that I have felt in the past and their implications. Wounds from others and family that I never had an ability to process through or heal from have been a driving force for this escape.
I'm glad forums like this exist and I'm praying the Lord can use this in my life and others' to gain some much needed perspective on this struggle. Maybe someone will be encouraged by my perspective here too and we can walk together towards the Lord. I'm looking forward to getting down to the bottom of this and hopefully ultimately finding some real freedom.
We all need each other for sure!
~ A brother in the Lord
I'm a new member as well. Have a great day!