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Post by Deleted on Jul 22, 2011 7:43:18 GMT -7
Hi Hisheart, Have you checked to see if there is a Celebrate Recovery group in your area? www.celebraterecovery.comScripture would not tell us that we must "resist the devil, and he will flee from us, if it were not possible. I suggest reading all of James 4 and 1 Cor. 10. TruthSeeker To be frank, I am leery of 12 step doctrine. I know many here subscribe to it, and I respect that it's helping them, but I have issues with it, and my husband has even more. I will pray about it though. I do know that there are celebrate recovery groups around here. |
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Post by Deleted on Jul 27, 2011 3:20:01 GMT -7
Oh DW!!!!
You made me laugh so hard with your hobbit description...that is exactly how I see men, I am skeeved when one stares at me when I am out with my family and it's hard to think that there are men out there who's lives are not involved in this stuff 
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Post by Deleted on Jul 27, 2011 5:08:41 GMT -7
Thanks, Lonely1. It helps to know that I'm not the only one who sees men in this light.
My best, DW
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Post by Deleted on Jul 27, 2011 7:09:37 GMT -7
A Thanks, Lonely1. It helps to know that I'm not the only one who sees men in this light. My best, DW Often when Anytime a man ogles me, or eyes me up and down, I glare at him. |
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Post by Deleted on Jul 27, 2011 7:29:15 GMT -7
Thanks, HisHeart. When these feelings come up......it's really nice to know I'm not the only one feeling them.
My best, DW
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Post by Deleted on Jul 27, 2011 7:37:37 GMT -7
Thanks, HisHeart. When these feelings come up......it's really nice to know I'm not the only one feeling them. My best, DW Actually, my husband told me that glaring at a man who ogles me, is actually a good thing to do. He said that the mam probably has me in some kind of fantasy in his mind, and the glare, will break right through the fantasy, and bring him right to reality. Iow, it's hard to maintain a fantasy about a glaring woman. The women in their fantasies are usually happy. You know, they want the man who is ogling them. |
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Post by Deleted on Jul 27, 2011 8:48:45 GMT -7
Excellent points.......one of the lies that porn tells a man is that there are women out there who are just breathless for them.......
a glaring woman.........perhaps with an extended middle finger.....would tend to break that fantasy rather quickly.
I really hate men at this point.......I really do.
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Post by Deleted on Jul 27, 2011 10:09:43 GMT -7
Excellent points.......one of the lies that porn tells a man is that there are women out there who are just breathless for them....... a glaring woman.........perhaps with an extended middle finger.....would tend to break that fantasy rather quickly. I really hate men at this point.......I really do. Please read Job, and read about Joseph, in Genesis. Also read about more recent men like George Mueller, and Jim Elliot. Not all men are unfaithfull or carnal to the core. In fact, some men never go down that path, no matter what many try to tell you. That said, the ones that are here for help, are acknowledging the wrong, and working hard to right their wrongs. I do have compassion for them, but I have to admit that I can feel somewhat double minded about them sometimes. |
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Post by Deleted on Jul 28, 2011 3:01:18 GMT -7
"....the ones that are here for help, are acknowledging the wrong, and working hard to right their wrongs..."
Perhaps so, perhaps not. In my experience, when addicts are caught red handed they want to appear as if they are doing everything possible to overcome their little problem.
Few, if any, truly want to change. They do what they have to do to convince their wives they want to change. Their initial efforts are an act. A facade. Nothing real. A play produced for our benefit. Addicts lie. How do you know they're lying? When their lips are moving.
I found my husband's stash on July 5, 2009. He played at recovery for a year and a half. Had our therapist convinced he was doing great. I kept saying HE'S NOT IN RECOVERY. HE CAN'T EVEN ADMIT THERE WERE PROBLEMS IN HIS FAMILY OF ORIGIN. HE'S NOT IN RECOVERY. She ignored me. On January 30, 2011, he drank himself into a near coma. he could no longer deny that he is an addict first and foremost. It's only been since he's been through chemical rehab that I've seen any real change in him. And I sure don't believe it will be long-lived.
I'm not double minded....in fact, I'm pretty decisive. They are scum until proven otherwise.
Please be careful. Don't allow yourself to be played again.
My best, DW
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