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Post by ladystrong on Mar 4, 2019 13:38:15 GMT -7
Seems like whenever I am thankful for where we are at as a couple, the enemy is right there accusing my husband in my thoughts or through triggers. It’s rather exhausting at times. I still have to fight this battle everyday. I have to make the moment by moment choice to give thanks whenever a bad thought comes into my mind. I’ve always been weak in this area. The enemy knows this. I’m going to keep choosing to look to God and give thanks. I pray that I’d be strengthened in the Spirit through all of these trials. Strength needs to come straight from Him, not myself!
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Post by ladystrong on Apr 6, 2019 20:37:27 GMT -7
Never ceases to amaze to see couples whom I thought were pretty good together suddenly separate. And it always amazes me when one side is cheating and acting like everything is OK. It’s like “WHAT THE HECK?! I thought I knew you!” I guess I shouldn’t be surprised after what I’ve been through but it still shocks me and makes me feel sad. That’s probably a good thing to have that reaction after all. Seems like family life is breaking apart so much quicker these days. More and more couples have children together without getting married. More and more divorces are happening around me, even between Christians. More and more children are being shuffled between two homes. More and more students are having anxiety and emotional issues. Don’t get me wrong, there are a lot of good things happening I guess my eyes are more open now that I’ve passed through this valley of pain. I feel sad for the kids who are involved because they bear so much of the pain and confusion without understanding what happened or what’s going on in them emotionally. And no one is guiding them to the truth. Just talking because a friend of ours is going through a rough time with his ex-girlfriend cheating on him, keeping it a secret for a year, and now getting engaged with her new beau. And in the middle is their son . We’re praying for all of them. I was hoping to talk some sense into her but it looks like she is too far gone. Anyway, we are doing well for the most part! I’d say I’m at 98% trust with my husband. He has his hang ups that he’s working through but we’re at a much better place than we’ve ever been in our whole marriage. We’re both really happy doing what we are doing separately and together. It’s a huge change. And even though I still have moments of sadness, I keep turning it over to gratefulness. Hope you are all doing well!
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Post by Deleted on Apr 7, 2019 13:43:47 GMT -7
People need to stop having sex before marriage and really getting to know the person long term before committing. I wish I had done that. Had I taken my time and really gotten to know Craig, I would have never married him. I will be praying for your friend. He is in a tough spot and so is his child.
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Post by ladystrong on May 23, 2019 6:49:50 GMT -7
Been awhile since I checked in! Good things have been happening in our lives! My art classes with the children are coming to an end this semester but I’ll be teaching a couple of classes in the summer. Next year, I might be teaching art at a local elementary school! I’m excited and scared at the same time because I’m not sure what to expect. I’ve been looking at this art position for awhile wondering about it because a friend of mine is the teacher. It was hard for me to see her in that position because she doesn’t have her credential. Envy started to creep in so I fought back by talking with God and remembering that He has great plans for me and for her. I am learning to rejoice and give thanks when others receive something that I wish I had. It has helped so much to change my mindset in that way. Less stress and more blessed! Anyway, out of the blue another friend calls me about that position! Thankfully I had all my art portfolio stuff together because I had taken a credential course this past year, so I submitted all my documents. I am so thankful for that online course even though it took a lot of time to put everything together! It really was worth it after all! Anyway, I’m hoping this is a good fit for me and that they will allow me to buy a huge amount of supplies. I want the next teacher to be set up for some good stuff if I don’t continue next year. I’m looking at still working with the junior high kids the following year.
Sorry for the rambling! God’s been opening up a flood of amazing things in my life ever since going through that trauma 2.5 years ago! I am thankful and in awe over His goodness 💜
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Post by Deleted on May 23, 2019 8:46:21 GMT -7
I am so happy for you! Be prepared for a small budget. Schools work with very little money. I have several teachers in my circle of family and friends. They love what they do. The only down side is the lack of supplies they face especially towards the end of the year. You will have to be creative (which is right up your alley!) with your art projects and using inexpensive supplies.
You are up for the challenge plus you have God on your side!
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Post by Will on Jun 22, 2019 1:29:43 GMT -7
Hi Ladystrong, that is wonderful to hear you are being so blessed. I truly believe it is the fruit of all your faith, patience, grace and most of all forgiveness of the last few years. Don't want to give you a big head but in case no-one else is telling you, you are an inspirational model of a Christian wife. God bless you and keep fighting the good fight!
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Post by ladystrong on Jul 1, 2019 22:03:10 GMT -7
Hey everyone! Just thought I'd check in for a bit. Doing well over here. I got to go to Hawai'i for my 20th high school reunion! A lot of people showed up to our alum night and then to the lu'au the following night. I had a great time, although I didn't really hang out with a particular group of people. Just kind of hopped around talking with whoever wanted to engage in conversation. I found that there are a lot of people hurting from divorce, separation, or the decline of the health of a relative. Gave me a glimpse into people's lives, people whom I didn't know that well in high school. I rejoined FB to start up my art biz and have connected to a lot more people. My main reasons for being there are to gain as much info about teaching art to K-12 students and to advertise about my art program. I feel like this time around I have a better head on my shoulders with sifting through info that's important to me vs. info that's just toxic. Still learning how to manage my time and not look to that whenever I have a free moment.
While in HI I got to see my family. It was a good reunion with my mom, brother, and dad but my sis was not welcoming at all. She barely acknowledged my presence every time I came over to the house. It was surprising and sad. There's a lot of tension between my mom and sis, always has been for 20 years but I think things are finally being severed, in a good way. The last day we were there my sis didn't even want to talk to my kids. Even my husband was surprised that she did not acknowledge him or our kids. It was hard but I made my way into the house and talked with my nephews and niece anyway. Before that, I was afraid to say or do anything. But, I heard the Holy Spirit just say that God has not given me a spirit of fear and to not be afraid of my sister because she is only a human being. And a human being with issues that have not been dealt with since she was a child. So, I went forward and talked to my nephews and niece. I could see that they were "shame", as we say in HI. The house was in shambles and it was basically a squalor. But I kept hearing "Love them anyway" and "Don't mind or mention the mess". My kids could not believe the state of the house or the smell. I'm sure my mom was scared for me but I didn't let that stop me. Those kids and my sister need to know that I love them anyway. There is a strong spiritual stronghold there that needs to be broken. I'm praying for them more often these days. I can't talk with my sister because she's basically shut down to any communication. It's just sad that she has taken things this far. So far that now my mom has been seeking legal advice to get her family evicted from the property. My sister's heart is cold and in a very dark place. My mom called me later to tell me that she couldn't believe I went into the house and talked with the nephews and nieces because usually i would have backed down with my sister being mean. I just told her that I felt the Holy Spirit tell me to not be afraid. My mom used the word "bold" and "strong". I wouldn't have been able to do that had it not been for these last 2.5 years of believing that God is greater than my fears, that He is for me, and that His opinion matters above everyone else's. No one can take away the truth that He loves me and that I am His. If I didn't know that deep down in my core, I would have walked away from that house afraid, confused and defeated. Nope, not anymore! I can stand up and look people in the eye and not be afraid!
Besides that little ending to our trip, which didn't affect me as emotionally as it has in the past, we had a great time at the beaches and eating the local foods. That was by far the best vacation trip I have ever had in my life, even with the kids in tow! We're hoping to go back next year but need to save up money big time.
I also successfully did a week long art camp with my kids and 4 others. It was a lot of fun and I'll be doing it again next week, with some different lessons. And, at the end of May I was offered a part time job at a local school! I was able to request materials that were pre-approved by the PTO board of that school and they added a raise to my pay. Those were two things that the previous art teacher didn't get or request when she was in that position. I was so thankful for God's provision and His leading. I mean, the job basically fell into my lap because of a few FB posts of my work and also knowing someone on the board. I start next school year with new materials and a fun group of kids who are excited about art. And, I also get to keep teaching at home for the homeschool students. I'm excited and nervous!
That's what's happening in my neck of the woods. I hope you are all doing well in your area and in your walk with the Lord!
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Post by ladystrong on Sept 4, 2019 15:30:13 GMT -7
Hi all! I just started teaching part time at a local school and it’s been a lot of fun! It’s a huge difference from being a Special Education teacher, which was really stressful. I love doing my job and praise God for opening the door for me via friends and FB posts!
Today I was teaching in my first class and things went well. At the very end, I noticed a kid with the same last name of OW and recognized her face from OW’s FB posts recently (I did check in to see if she was still around town). Not absolutely sure but looks like I will be teaching OW’s grand daughter 😳. Of course, I’m staying at that school site and will treat her grand daughter like all the other kids. It just feels weird. I know that it’s just the enemy trying to get at me, especially after I declared that it feels really good to know that God is with me and in me! And also thanked God for giving me this easy going opportunity to teach kids what I love and have fun. All I know is God is good and does things for my benefit and His glory. I will cling to that and see what the school year brings!
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Post by Deleted on Sept 4, 2019 18:10:39 GMT -7
I am glad you are enjoying teaching! You are right that the enemy is trying to get to you. Just remember she is not her grandmother and she is God's child. Ask the Lord to give you His eyes when you look at her. It's truly amazing how that request changes your view of a person.
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Post by ladystrong on Sept 9, 2019 18:11:10 GMT -7
I have to admit that there were a couple of days where I was really upset. Upset at my husband and feeling like “why do I have to suffer and still have to deal with this when it was his fault?!” I did express that and he understood. I didn’t keep badgering him though, like I would have in the past. I kept hearing God say to trust Him and let it go because it’s not worth losing sleep/joy/peace over one person who does not have power over me. Like I said before, I’m staying put at the school site and we’re not leaving the county any time soon. God is good and He’s making more like His Son, Jesus Christ.
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Post by ladystrong on Oct 10, 2019 13:19:43 GMT -7
Pray up people!
I just encountered OW with her grandchild at the pet store. My “spidey senses”, aka Holy Spirit senses, were up while I was at the cashier counter that told me to not turn around or acknowledge the person behind me. I glanced over as I was leaving to get my kids from the adopt-a-kitten area and noticed a woman and child. That’s when I just knew it was her. My heart was beating and I felt nervous but I stayed focused on my boys. I saw the side of her face as well as her grandchild, whom I teach. Thankfully there was no interaction because I’m not sure I would have said anything beneficial. I got to talk with my husband afterward and am so glad I asked him for prayer a few hours before! I know now that she is just a human being under the enemy’s control. I would never trust her to be a friend and I don’t want the enemy to gain control of my thoughts and emotions through her. But, she is a human being, God’s creation, and for that reason I won’t stir up any strife. Enough damage has been done and so much good has happened in the last 3 years that it could not compare to all the damage that was caused. God is good and He has good plans for His children. I will hold on to that instead of the past!
Friends, the enemy is so near and knows our triggers so we have to be ready and vigilant. Gird up your loins and keep fighting the battle!
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Post by Deleted on Oct 10, 2019 19:10:06 GMT -7
Praying hon.
You are right that the enemy knows our weaknesses. He has tried to hit me in mine...which is finances. I did lose my peace for a few minutes before getting back under God's wings. I have no idea where the money is going to come from to get mom and I through the rest of the month but God is my provider.
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Post by ladystrong on Oct 11, 2019 7:41:09 GMT -7
Praying hon. You are right that the enemy knows our weaknesses. He has tried to hit me in mine...which is finances. I did lose my peace for a few minutes before getting back under God's wings. I have no idea where the money is going to come from to get mom and I through the rest of the month but God is my provider. I will lift up a prayer for you right now! Jesus, You are our provider. You are the lifter of our heads. You are our healer. I pray that you would bring Amy and her mom the money that they need to get through not just this month, but many months to come. We trust that You are good. We rejoice ahead of time to see what You will do in this situation! May Your miraculous ways be praised by all who witness Your goodness in their lives! May Your glory be evident in their lives! In Your name we pray. Amen 💜
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Post by Deleted on Oct 12, 2019 4:48:56 GMT -7
Praying hon. You are right that the enemy knows our weaknesses. He has tried to hit me in mine...which is finances. I did lose my peace for a few minutes before getting back under God's wings. I have no idea where the money is going to come from to get mom and I through the rest of the month but God is my provider. I will lift up a prayer for you right now! Jesus, You are our provider. You are the lifter of our heads. You are our healer. I pray that you would bring Amy and her mom the money that they need to get through not just this month, but many months to come. We trust that You are good. We rejoice ahead of time to see what You will do in this situation! May Your miraculous ways be praised by all who witness Your goodness in their lives! May Your glory be evident in their lives! In Your name we pray. Amen 💜 Thank you. Hugs sweetheart.
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Post by ladystrong on Dec 6, 2019 14:34:50 GMT -7
Been awhile since I’ve posted. We are doing well as we approach year 3 since d-day, aka “the worst day of my entire life”! Sometimes I can’t remember how hurt/paranoid/stressed/heartbroken I felt during that first year. I know I had terrible moments of gripping fear, temptations, anger, anxiety and confusion. It was more than just “rough”. I recently apologized to my husband for saying a lot of hurtful things in my fits of rage. He understood and forgave me.
Since I’ve been teaching art consistently at the public school and at home, I’ve been able to earn money to pay down our debt and soon we’ll be able to save more for fun trips! It’s a HUGE change from where we were three years ago. I’m just glad we aren’t there anymore and we’ve moved forward in our lives. I still do have moments but they are short and I have more self-control to bridle my tongue. It’s a big lesson in trusting God with all that happened during that time. He really allowed us to be shaken up and brought back into alignment with His will.
We might be starting up a bible study in January for anyone who wants to join us. I’m a bit apprehensive only because we have our three rascally boys who can start fights as soon as I walk out of the room. We’re praying about it. I always wanted to have a bible study here but it was based on “looking righteous” or doing it because others had suggested it. So, I’m letting my husband lead and I know God can help us to make it work if it’s His will 💜
Merry Christmas everyone!
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